Serious FAQ

Q: Who is Bob the Spider?

A: He’s the world’s first arachnid superstar! He’s good friends with God and lives in Stephen Fry’s left nostril. He has a twitter account that he sporadically updates.

Q: What’s the evolutionary history of the Eyeball Plant?

A: There are some very interesting books on that subject, a couple of them only published quite recently, but I don’t have copies at hand, and I don’t want to give a wrong answer. Let’s just say it’s a long and very strange story.

Q: The portal to the Fortunate Isles runs on anthic energy, but how does the portal to Desert Bridge work?

A: This is slightly embarrassing. I used an ancient toolset commonly referred to as “Visual Basic” to make it, which is why it isn’t quite compatible with modern technology. I should’ve gone for organic technology like that which The Mysterious-Druid uses, but I just wasn’t good enough at it.

Q: How does one gerbelize things?

A: It’s best to do it quickly and get it over with.

Q: So, this Urizen fellow. Where can I find out more about him?

A: They say he had a couple of run-ins with William Blake back in the day, but it’s possible that this isn’t entirely the same Urizen.

Q: Have you ever been to Oneiropolis?

A: I’m not sure. Maybe a long time ago. I do intend to go there to witness what happens when Urizen finally arrives at its gates, though. Should make for a very good novel.

Q: What is it with you and mushrooms?

A: Mushrooms are awesome. They’re like plants, but totally not. Here, read the Wikipedia entry on fungi. Or the Oneiropolis Compendium entry about the World Mushroom.

Q: Reading about the Lands of Dream makes me feel good, but the real world makes me sad. What should I do?

A: Change the real world. (Not yourself.)

Q: Wh r thr n vwls n ths sntnc?

A: You must have encountered a Internetual Vowel Eater. Count yourself lucky, it could’ve been an Interplanetary Bowel Eater.

  • Monkeys